A lot of the things I do are the sort of things I think are funny.

I think in Russia, there's a lot of storytelling and anecdotes.

I just loved comedy as a kid and I think at some point, it just occurred to me that you could try it, and I did.

The good thing about being stuck at the airport for an extra hour, is that it gives you a chance to give weary travelers surprise massages.

There's something therapeutic about connecting with an audience - when there's something really sort of odd or silly that you think is funny, and conveying it to an audience.

Everyone knows that Jews control the media and banks and stuff. But did you know that when you go to a carnival and you have to be a certain height to go on a ride, Jews control that height? It has nothing to do with safety. It's just us flexing our Semitic muscles.

In this time of recession, it is the time for invention. Did you know both the telephone and the automobile were invented during recessions? So was 'talking dirty.'