It's important to prepare audience for the worst in life. People come to forget their problems, and it's my job, right before I leave, to go, "Don't forget: You're going through a divorce and there's a recession." It's always good to end on a pensive note.

I just loved comedy as a kid and I think at some point, it just occurred to me that you could try it, and I did.

I think in Russia, there's a lot of storytelling and anecdotes.

It's easy to sit on a mountaintop and tell people what to do and how to be happy. I have chosen to do that. Not because it's easy, but for a different reason, which I would reveal, if your mind was ready to handle it, which it isn't, which is also very convenient for me.

I spent the day today at Brighton Beach, walking around. It's a Russian/Jewish neighborhood. And I was in a store and I saw a board game called 'Let My People Go,' based on the Jews' exodus from Egypt. I was like, 'Too soon.

Never give in to peer pressure, especially if the peer is not attractive.

If no one figures out you are pretending to be retarded, your life will be greeted with treasure.