A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th thruth iv th matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him.

It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts.

A man can be right and president, but he can't be both at the same time.

Vice goes along way towards making life bearable. A little vice now and then is relished by the best of men.

Drink never made a man better, but it has made many a man think he was better.