To most people a savage nation is wan that doesn't wear oncomf'rtable clothes.

Most vegetarians I ever see looked enough like their food to be classed as cannibals.

It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.

Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts.

I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription.

Trust ivrybody-but cut th' cards.

The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.