Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.

Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.

A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic; but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.

A man's idee in a card game is war

A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable

Freedom is like drink. If you take any at all, you might as well take enough to make you happy for a while.

No matter whether the Constitution follows the flag or not, the Supreme Court follows the election returns.