A man's idee in a card game is war

It must be a good thing to be good or ivrybody wudden't be pretendin' he was.

Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.

There aint any news in being good. You might write the doings of all the convents of the world on the back of a postage stamp, and have room to spare.

It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.

When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.

Many a man that couldn't direct ye to th' drug store on th' corner when he was thirty will get a respectful hearin' when age has further impaired his mind.