What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

Th' newspaper does ivrything f'r us. It runs th' polis foorce an' th' banks, commands th' milishy, controls th' ligislachure, baptizes th' young, marries th' foolish, comforts th' afflicted, afflicts th' comfortable, buries th' dead an' roasts thim aftherward.

Freedom is like drink. If you take any at all, you might as well take enough to make you happy for a while.

The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.

High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.

No matter whether the Constitution follows the flag or not, the Supreme Court follows the election returns.