High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.

A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th thruth iv th matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him.

A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable

What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.

A Mormon is a man that has the bad taste and the religion to do what a good many other people are restrained from doing by conscientious scruples and the police.