Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

A man can be right and president, but he can't be both at the same time.

Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.

To most people a savage nation is wan that doesn't wear oncomf'rtable clothes.

When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.

The American nation in the sixth ward is a fine people; they love the eagle - on the back of a dollar.