It [Thanksgiving] was founded by the Puritans to give thanks for bein' preserved from the Indians, an' we keep it to give thanks we are preserved from the Puritans.

If a man is wise, he gets rich an' if he gets rich, he gets foolish, or his wife does. That's what keeps the money movin' around.

Vice is a creature of such hideous mien... that the more you see it the better you like it

High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.

The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married.

Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.

It must be a good thing to be good or ivrybody wudden't be pretendin' he was.