If ye live enough befure thirty ye won't care to live at all afther fifty.

What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.

High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.

A man can be right and president, but he can't be both at the same time.

Th' newspaper does ivrything f'r us. It runs th' polis foorce an' th' banks, commands th' milishy, controls th' ligislachure, baptizes th' young, marries th' foolish, comforts th' afflicted, afflicts th' comfortable, buries th' dead an' roasts thim aftherward.

A man's idee in a card game is war

Trust ivrybody-but cut th' cards.