The council in Blackpool have given the homeless bus passes, but how would they know where to get off?

Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish.

I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle."

Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?

Two Irishmen were passing a pub - well, it could happen.

I've been married to my wife for 60 years but it feels just like yesterday, and you know what a bloody awful day yesterday was.

My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon.