The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business

Only thirteen, and she knows how to nasty.

You know, people are basically shitty. It's when they prove it over and over again that it gets obnoxious.

My theory is that there is no word that you can say or noise that you can make with your mouth that is so horrible that it will send you to burn forever in that lake of fire! It's not gonna happen.

Classical music is this music that was written by a bunch of dead people a long time ago.

Sit and spin 'til you rot on the cosmic utensil.

The devil, he's about this big. He had a red suit on and a widow's peak, and then a pointed tail, and like a sulfur reek. Yes, it was him alright, I swear.