There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.

There is no accounting for tastes, as the woman said when someone told her her son was wanted by the police.

Remember how excited you were when you turned five years old. Today, you should be 10 times that excited. Happy 50th birthday!

Having imagination, it takes you an hour to write a paragraph that, if you were unimaginative, would take you only a minute. Or you might not write the paragraph at all.

Chaos breeds life, while order breeds success.

We deny that it is fun to be saving. It is fun to be prodigal. Go to the butterfly, thou parsimonious sluggard; consider her ways and get wise.

To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.