Three million frogs' legs are served in Paris - daily. Nobody knows what became of the rest of the frogs.

Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut.

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap.

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.

During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.

All that the comedian has to show for his years of work and aggravation is the echo of forgotten laughter.

It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.