We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.

The American arrives in Paris with a few French phrases he has culled from a conversational guide or picked up from a friend who owns a beret.

Radio is called a medium because it is rare that anything is well done.

English coffee tastes like water that has been squeezed out of a wet sleeve.

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference.

During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.

The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.