After quitting radio I was able to live on the money I saved on aspirins.

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

Condensed milk is wonderful. I don't see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans.

The American arrives in Paris with a few French phrases he has culled from a conversational guide or picked up from a friend who owns a beret.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.

An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.