Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.
On ships they call them barnacles; in business they attach themselves to desks and are called vice presidents.
A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.
My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.