The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year.

The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.

It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.