Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
My hometown was so dull that one time the tide went out and never came back.
If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.
Television is the triumph of machine over people.
If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.