It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.

Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.

A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.

There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.