Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.

The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think- Ladies' Home JournalI'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four

An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.

A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.

Hollywood is a great place if you're an orange.

The American arrives in Paris with a few French phrases he has culled from a conversational guide or picked up from a friend who owns a beret.

He has no idea what it was like to grow up in the South, where you had to hold your head down.