Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year.

On ships they call them barnacles; in business they attach themselves to desks and are called vice presidents.

A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.

The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.

Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting my quill back in my goose.

During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.