A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
He always had a chip on his shoulder that he was ready to use to kindle an argument.
An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
English coffee tastes like water that has been squeezed out of a wet sleeve.
There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.
If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.