He has no idea what it was like to grow up in the South, where you had to hold your head down.

A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.

He always had a chip on his shoulder that he was ready to use to kindle an argument.

An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.

English coffee tastes like water that has been squeezed out of a wet sleeve.

There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.

If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.