Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.
She used to be a teacher but she has no class now.
Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.