If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.
Hush, little bright line, donโt you cry Youโll be a clichรฉ by and by.
A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.