The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.

Radio is a bag of mediocrity where little men with carbon minds wallow in sluice of their own making.

Everything is for the eye these days - TV, Life, Look, the movies. Nothing is just for the mind. The next generation will have eyeballs as big as cantaloupes and no brain at all.

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.

A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.

The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what the third thing is.