With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense?

I went up on stage, and said, "Why did the chicken cross the road? To check out the chicks." I was a genius at 10. Try telling that at 21, and you look hacky and stupid. That was the only joke I've ever told. Everything since has been character voices, doing impressions or just telling stories.

Once I started doing specials I always incorporated "Fluffy" into it. But with Stand-Up Revolution, I left it out because I want it to be different for people. I'm there, yes, but it's something different.

Me racist? The only race I hate is the one you have to run.

As far as guys who perform onstage, I love Chris Rock. I'm kind of jaded on everyone else.

The girl voice is always going to kill because they don't expect it.

I think the furthest I ever got was Guitar Hero. If I could start a band like that, I think I could do it.