I was very dirty; I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started.

People think if you have money, it'll fix the problems, but it creates different ones.

I started talking about things that everybody could relate to. And that's not to say I deserted my roots, I just found a way to talk about things in a broad way.

Anything is possible as long as you're focused, determined and you really want to do it.

Now I understand why people do drugs, why people drink, and why people go crazy. As the success level goes up and up and up, the further detached I get from everybody else. Luckily, with my girlfriend, everything is gravy because I brought her into it. I brought her in and she's very hands on with my career.

There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.

You know what I learned about Hawaiians? They're just blown up Mexicans!