I know enough football to know that's funny!

I don't have to worry about writing jokes. I just tell stories about things that have happened to me. As long as I'm alive and I'm living and I'm experiencing different things every day, the show will always change.

There are certain bits in my act that will never change.

I'm a big guy, but I'm really simple with the food. I'll hit the In-N-Out or just the regular buffets.

Believe it or not, I've got a really bad metabolism. One burger and I'm done. I'm not a guy that puts away 10 burgers.

As a comedian, especially one that works as much as I do, there is a lot of sacrifice. People don't see that I'm away from my family 46 weeks out of the year. I miss all the birthdays and anniversaries and holidays.

When you go to Hawaii, it's all about "Aloha." It means hello, goodbye and I love you.