I'm scared of snakebites - that's the origin of cowboy boots, protection - but my toes need to breathe.

I find comedians to be the biggest cocksuckers, because they don't want people to know how easy it is.

I started noticing a lot of big companies are bored with ads; they feel sort of lost in the advertising world. They're not into magazines anymore.

I feel like the government is more evil than most corporations.

"My only problem with women breastfeeding in public is they never wink back." It's kind of the perfect joke because it's a bait and switch.

Once I sold my shares and figured I wanted to get out of the magazine business it was like, "Now I can do whatever I want, anything I want in the world." And I guess I subconsciously hoped it would be something a little more adult. But I just want to do funny shorts, and TV is the ultimate endpoint for that.

I'm scared of snakebites - that's the origin of cowboy boots, protection - but my toes need to breathe.