In my retirement I go for a short swim at least once or twice every day. It's either that or buy a new golf ball.

Education can get you the only thing that really matters in today's world--an assigned parking space.

Our marriage has always been a 50-50 proposition - with the possible exception of closet space.

On the seventh day God rested. His grandchildren must have been out of town.

Grandchildren don't stay young forever, which is good because Pop-pops have only so many horsey rides in them.

Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.

I don't intentionally spoil my grandkids. It's just that correcting them often takes more energy than I have left.