I like to do nice things for my grandchildren - like buy them those toys I've always wanted to play with.

Education can get you the only thing that really matters in today's world--an assigned parking space.

Grandparents are there to help the child get into mischief they haven't thought of yet.

Grandchildren don't stay young forever, which is good because Pop-pops have only so many horsey rides in them.

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it.

Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.

My grandkids believe I'm the oldest thing in the world. And after two or three hours with them, I believe it, too.