I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.

How can I die? I'm booked.

I use the cigar for timing purposes. If I tell a joke, I smoke as long as they laugh and when they stop laughing I take the cigar out of my mouth and start my next joke.

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

People are always asking me when I'm going to retire. Why should I? I've got it two ways - I'm still making movies, and I'm a senior citizen, so I can see myself at half price.

I find you have to take each day as it comes and be thankful for who's left and whatever you can still do.