I'd say that about 82 percent of what I write is bad, but don't go by me; I'm as bad a judge as I am a writer. Look, if it were all good, you'd be paying twice as much for this book.

People are always asking me how much I'm worth. Well, all I can say is, I've got enough money to last me the rest of my life. As long as I die in the next 20 minutes.

Critics are eunuchs at a gang bang.

It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

My best advice: Fall in love with what you do for a living.

If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.

In those days the best painkiller was ice; it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.