Well, anybody can be a straight man if he hears well. You just have to wait for laughs. A straight man just repeats the questions and the comedian gets the laughs and you just wait for them and don't let them die completely at the tail end of the laugh.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.

When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.