At home we ate fish every Friday, as Catholics were then supposed to do. Being Jewish, I compromised. I wore a hat when I ate fish, out of respect for my own religion and the fish's family.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

The happiest people I know are the ones that are still working. The saddest are the ones who are retired. Very few performers retire on their own. It's usually because no one wants them. Six years ago Sinatra announced his retirement. He's still working.

In those days the best painkiller was ice; it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.

Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.

It's one of the old show business axioms. No matter how successful you've been, there's always a younger and sexier seal coming along.