When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.

Much later in life, though, Gracie made a major contribution to the opera world. She stayed out of it.

From Paris we took the Orient Express to Vienna. I must say I was terribly disappointed; nobody was murdered on the train.

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.