Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left

What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.

I like women to be attracted to me. See, when you get 60 years old, and they know you're 60, the only women you can get are 55-year-old women, and I like younger women.

I get up every morning and read the obituary column. If my name's not there, I eat breakfast.

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

It's one of the old show business axioms. No matter how successful you've been, there's always a younger and sexier seal coming along.

If you were married to Marilyn Monroe, you'd cheat with some ugly girl.