My major contribution to the format was to suggest that I be able to step out of the plot and speak directly to the audience, and then be able to go right back into the action. That was an original idea of mine; I know it was because I originally stole it from Thornton Wilder's play Our Town.

Happiness is a dry martini and a good woman ... or a bad woman.

If I paid ten dollars for a cigar, first I'd make love to it, then I'd smoke it.

I don't care what you do for a living. If you love it, you are a success.

When they saw me walking down the street smoking a cigar, they'd say, 'Hey, that 14-year-old kid may be going places.' Of course it's also a good prop on the stage ... When you can't think of what you're supposed to say next, you can puff on your cigar until you think of your next line.

When we played the back end of a horse we always knew that if we worked hard and did a good job we could become the front end.

I like women to be attracted to me. See, when you get 60 years old, and they know you're 60, the only women you can get are 55-year-old women, and I like younger women.