When they saw me walking down the street smoking a cigar, they'd say, 'Hey, that 14-year-old kid may be going places.' Of course it's also a good prop on the stage ... When you can't think of what you're supposed to say next, you can puff on your cigar until you think of your next line.

I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don't have to respect anybody.

When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.

I did go to school - my kind of school. When I was a kid I went out ... and you meet people. You talk to them. Anybody says something that makes sense, it stays with you, rubs off on you. That kind of school.

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

If you were married to Marilyn Monroe, you'd cheat with some ugly girl.

Say Goodnight Gracie.