I don't worry about getting old. I'm old already. Only young people worry about getting old.

None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.

People are always asking me how much I'm worth. Well, all I can say is, I've got enough money to last me the rest of my life. As long as I die in the next 20 minutes.

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.

It's one of the old show business axioms. No matter how successful you've been, there's always a younger and sexier seal coming along.

When I was in Vegas women were throwing their hotel keys at me. But it was after they checked out.

Much later in life, though, Gracie made a major contribution to the opera world. She stayed out of it.