Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

It's one of the old show business axioms. No matter how successful you've been, there's always a younger and sexier seal coming along.

I've been a straight man for so many years that from force of habit I repeat everything. I went out fishing with a fellow the other day and he fell overboard. He yelled, Help! Help! Help! so I said, Help? Help? Help? And while I was waiting for him to get his laugh, he drowned.

I must be getting absent-minded. Whenever I complain that things aren't what they used to be, I always forget to include myself.

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.