Just because you're old that doesn't mean you're more forgetful. The same people whose names I can't remember now I couldn't remember fifty years ago. . .

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

When I was in Vegas women were throwing their hotel keys at me. But it was after they checked out.

A married couple that plays cards together is just a fight that hasn't started yet.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

It's no surprise that things are so screwed up: everyone that knows how to run a government is either driving taxicabs or cutting hair.

I'd rather be a flop at show business than to be a success at something I didn't like.