Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

Children are not our future, and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic. Children can't be our future, because by the time the future arrives, they won't be children anymore, so blow me!

There's this man who lives in the sky, and he has ten things he doesn't want you to do, and you'll burn for a long time if you do them. But he loves you.

You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.

If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.

If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.