Regarding jam sessions: Jazz musicians are the only workers I can think of who are willing to put in a full shift for pay and then go somewhere else and continue to work for free.

Here's a phrase that apparently the airlines simply made up: near miss. They say that if 2 planes almost collide, it's a near miss. Bullshit, my friend. It's a near hit! A collision is a near miss. [WHAM! CRUNCH!] "Look, they nearly missed!" "Yes, but not quite.

The truth is, Pavlov's dog trained Pavlov to ring this bell just before the dog salivated.

We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.

I don't understand why prostitution is illegal, Selling is legal, f***ing is legal. So why isn't it legal to sell f***ing? Why should it be illegal to sell something that's legal to give away?

I do something about the weather. I stay home.