My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me.

Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies.

To me, fast food is when a cheetah eats an antelope.

Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.

If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. And probably increase.

To me the cynics are the ones in the boardrooms with the reports from the focus groups.

When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.