When I'm not actually doing my work, I'm planning it or thinking about it or reading things that on some level are transformed into performance fantasies. I have no active interests. I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind.

Energy experts have announced the development of a new fuel made from human brain tissue. It's called assohol.

If you take five white guys and put 'em with five black guys, and let 'em hang around together for about a month, and at the end of the month, you'll notice that the white guys are walking and talking and standing like the black guys do. You'll never see the black guys going, "Oh, golly! We won the big game today, yes sir!" But you'll see guys with red hair named Duffy going, "What's happenin'?"

In most polls there are always about 5 percent of the people who 'don't know.' What isn't generally understood is that it's the same people in every poll.

By elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

Sometimes, when I was really loaded, I'd sit on the floor and sort out every nut and bolt in the house. It was just sheer insanity. And often there'd be speed in the cut, so I was a speed freak, too.

I'll tell you a little secret about the Blues: it's not enough to know which notes to play, you have to know why they need to be played.