Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.

On Thanksgiving, you realize you're living in a modern world. Millions of turkeys baste themselves in millions of ovens that clean themselves.

Sudden total weight loss.

As you swim the river of live, do the breast stroke. It helps to clear the turds from your path.

George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.

I definitely have a gift for language that is rhythmic and attractive to the ear, and I have interesting [verbal] imagery which I guess is a poetic touch.

Religion is just mind control.