In terms of coke, the only money I ever thought about was that dollar bill I had stuck up my nose.

Avoid people with gold teeth who want to play cards

Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.

If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.

There's some invisible guy, up in the sky, who can kill you, because he loves you.

And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me.

How old are you? 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.