Part of the pleasure of being alive is the knowledge that you're not dead yet.

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.

Abraham Maslow said that the fully realized person transcends his local group and identifies with the species. But the election of Ronald Reagan might've been the beginning of my giving up on my species. Because it was absurd. To this day it remains absurd. More than absurd, it was frightening: it represented the rise to supremacy of darkness, the ascendancy of ignorance.

I think it would be fair and right to use some of my land and wealth for a drug-rehab center or an Indian school.

Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.

If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed.

Professional soldiers are people who die for a living.